From adamp@andrew.cmu.edu Sun Jan 9 19:08:40 2005 Date: Sun, 9 Jan 2005 19:08:40 -0500 (EST) From: Adam Pennington To: post+assocs.scotch-n-soda.board@andrew.cmu.edu Subject: Dance Party Drama or Why doesn't anybody drink scotch-n-soda at an SnS gathering? Just found the document which used to be passed down from EBM to EBM. As the EBM doesn't do the scheduling any more, a few things might not make sense. It appears I broke the chain, but wanted to add an OCR'd copy back to the collective memory. I hope Ayne doesn't mind. ----- Dance Party Drama or Why doesn't anybody drink scotch-n-soda at an SnS gathering? By Ayne Terceira, EBM '99 -'00 Being an EBM is like being at a party you weren't invited to. No one knows quite why you are there, nor do they have the power to make you leave. You can leap into conversations if you like, but the best you can do is give some opinion, or maybe a relevant anecdote. Nothing you say is with any defined authority. All in all, people wish you would just get some chips and leave quitely. Well, screw them. So here you are, my mend. Time to get out the lampshade and embrace awkwardness. This position is all about entertaining yourself. Remember, you came to this party by your own Free Will. This fact should mean a lot to you. Don't be lame. One does not go to a party and then complain that they are there. That would be lame. Instead, this is your time to get your groove on. Be creative. Offer to tend bar. Come up with party games that everyone will enjoy. During the midnight ebb, start dancin' baby, start dancin'! During the course of the party, you may find some bitchy girl crying in the bathroom. Her name is DC Reservations. She will claim that her boyftiend, (historically the GMC), made a whole bunch of promises that he didn't keep. Get her some tissues and a glass of water. As annoying as this may be, you don't want to get on her bad side. While comforting her, encourage her to give the GMC another chance. Show her how nice other partygoers can be. Subtly get her to take back her boyftiend or she will screw everyone at the party in a juvenile act of vengeance. There is little one can do about the make-out couch ofSnS cliques. There is no hose you can turn on them that will make anybody regard the party as an organization. Despite the fact that their entwined groping alienates some partygoers (who will therefore never return again), it is the nature of the party to be thus segregated. In the past year, we have worked hard to get the smoochers to the same side of the room. I am proud of this. And that is not to say that during a production, they don't come up for air. I only make the point that generally, those who came to the party together don't mingle. Perhaps in future years, some ineffable game of Twister will be found to remedy this. But I fear that game is still located on some hard to reach shelf in an unknown back closet. A show in production needs to be watched. All too frequently some partygoer will notice a poor show vomiting over the balcony. We tend to blame the show for not being responsible or not knowing its limits. Yet who was serving drinks here, who bought the alcohol and collected the money, and most importantly who will be prosecuted if a show should die from a scotch-nsoda overdose? You are required to check in twice with a show during a production. This is your duty and not your burden. To do so while the night is still young helps no one. To do so while the show is convulsing on the floor is help too late. Feed the show some bread and water on an hourly basis and everything turns out okay. During the preview process, you will be asked to make a choice. You can choose to drink hard liquor or take a soft drink. I suppose you could also abstain from both, but what type of decision is that? In past years, we were an organization of light drinkers. By doing so, we have been regarded as pansies. The lack of social pressure has allowed for any bum off the street to waltz in and bring his CD's filled with lame music and videos ofbad movies. (And frankly, how many times can you watch Ishtar and listen to Milli Vanilli before you just wanna punch someone.) Only this year have we delved into the hard stuff under the guise of "having balls." In the process, we have drunk ourselves blind. We have become intoxicated to the point where we cannot appreciate the repercussions of our actions. We no longer have fun. My advice is this; temper the hard liquor with the soft stuff, keep your wits about you. Be responsible. Now there are some partygoers that come to a party already drunk. I hate this type of behavior almost as much as I hate those who show up late. I hate it more when you happen to be proposing a show at this particular party, and there they are - drunk as a skunk. This behavior is insulting and unprofessional. However, the problem is that the other partygoers often will not notice or will think this behavior cool. It is not cool! My suggestion to you is this, become a bouncer. I regret not doing this in my wall flower days. If they knock at the board meeting door stinking of the juice, go to the President (or as I like to call him -"the host") and tell him to correct this behavior. My last point is this: always stay to the end of the party. Dedicate your time. Make sure everyone gets home safe. Give people rides if they need them. Help clean up, because, frankly, it was your party too. Putting in the effort not only will endear you to the other partygoers, but maybe next time you'll actually be invited.